Drunk Dude Allows 8-yr Old Son To Drive Him Home

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There is no argument that appointing a designated driver is the mature and responsible thing to do when alcohol is being consumed in large quantities. But, we mustn’t forget that said driver is supposed to be legally eligible to drive… even if he’s your precocious little boy!

Well our friend in the deep south forgot that one minor detail when he drunkenly threw his eight year old boy the keys. This Bonnie and Clyde buffoonery all went down in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Ah yes… our buddies near the Gulf – which after reading and writing a plethora of news articles, I am convinced the man was merely sticking to the tradition of affording our southern buddies the ability to continue as the top procurers of goofy-ass tales.

According to Louisiana State Police, “the 8-year-old boy was driving a pickup truck down an interstate while his drunken father slept in the passenger seat.” Let’s make this story a little sweeter, shall we? Oh yeah, “troopers say the man’s 4-year-old daughter was in the back seat when the truck was stopped Saturday morning in Livingston Parish.” This is the kind of story that almost makes you wish the man had the courage to drive drunk right up until the point he kissed that big oak tree in the village square.

As it turns out, the child was caught after a number of concerned motorists contacted police due to the erratic driving style. Well, what do you expect? It’s hard to drive while balancing on a phone book. “The boy was doing the speed limit, 70 mph, and pulled over when the police cruiser turned its lights on.” Luckily, as of now, “the children have been handed over to Louisiana Child Protective Services and the father, 28-year-old Billy Joe Madden of Hattiesburg, Miss., was booked into the Livingston Parish Jail on charges including Child Desertion and Allowing a Minor to Drive with a bail bond set at $1,474.00.”

At the point of the arrest, it wasn’t certain if Madden had an attorney present but I’m sure he had plenty of Chuck E. Cheese tokens.

(Image from L.A. State Police)

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