Forget Something: Abandoned Sneakers Filled with Cocaine

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Traveling light is all the rage these days. Thanks for the advice, mom. I mean after all, it becomes either lost baggage or must-check. But just because you have no bags, doesn’t mean no trouble.

Just ask one individual who flew into New York’s JFK Airport this past Saturday and abandoned several pairs of sneakers — blasphemy, right? Not just any sneakers, however. These bad boys were filled with roughly five pounds of cocaine — word to Pablo Escobar.

While the authorities are still searching for said patron, we can only hope that he was able to purchase some more shoes and not forced to creep around in dark, back alleys barefoot — ouch. And as for the nose candy he so conveniently left behind — feeble attempt, bro. In your shoes? Maybe try a little rectal surprise next time (yes, I did go there).

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