The Confirmation: How To Keep A Date


Gentlemen, gentlemen, gentlemen. Every once in a while I notice an emerging dating pattern so unbelievable, so downright ridiculous, that it forces me to question everything that I thought I knew to be true about the single life. Today, that pattern is the lack of communication surrounding The Confirmation.

Here’s the scenario: I met a man, and email information/phone numbers were exchanged. We began a delightful email correspondence, and things appeared to be progressing swimmingly. We like the same books, hail from the same state, enjoy Italian food. He asked me out on a lovely, preplanned date, and I graciously accepted his invitation. We both expressed appropriate excitement at the prospect of spending some good old-fashioned face-time together, and I went shopping for something to wear.

What happened next, you ask?

Well, dear reader, that’s the kicker: nothing. No phone call. No email or text. No, “Hey, are we still on for tonight?” shot up in smoke signals over the greater Los Angeles area.

Just, silence. As a woman, at this point I become conflicted. Common sense dictates that I do not, under any circumstances, get into my car and drive to our predetermined meeting place. Had he planned on keeping the date he would have sent The Confirmation, right? But what if it’s not that simple? What if he has every intention of meeting me for oysters, and is at this very moment in his car driving to Santa Monica Seafood, blithely unaware of his former would be date’s tormented state across town?

At this point in the game it’s totally irrelevant , because no matter what convoluted scenarios and explanations I can develop in my mind as to why I have yet to receive The Confirmation, the fact is his silence has made my decision for me. There is no way I am getting into my car and making the trip to Santa Monica Seafood where I may or may not be getting stood up. Not a chance. I’d rather go to the gym, eat cheese for dinner, and watch last night’s episode of The Bad Girl’s Club. Again.

So, gentlemen, do us a favor. If you want to keep the date, confirm it. If you don’t, let us know. Send an email. Send your assistant. Put forth one iota of the effort it took for you to plan the date to make sure we’re still on, and let us know that you value our time. Or don’t, and enjoy your oysters solo.

Written By: Angelica Martin

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